Just between us is when we get together once a month or so and say the things that you think but don’t really say. Or you do say, but only to certain people. I’ll go first, then you share in the comments and everyone will feel a whole lot better.
Just between us…
1. In another life I used to have this completely insane job where I worked for this lady who bred Mexican hairless dogs. My job involved the usual stuff like walking the dogs and picking up poop, but also bonkers stuff like holding them in tanning beds (they’d get very pale in the winter compared to Mexican hairless dogs from Mexico) and rubbing lotion on their dry skin.*
Honestly? The lotion was good stuff and I used it on my own hands still today.
*This is (one of the reasons) why I hate rubbing sunscreen on people’s backs, so unless you are one of my children do not ever ask me to do this for you. Learn to flex your shoulders and put sunscreen on your own damn back like a regular person.
2. The other day I watched this touching mother-daughter scene on a TV show and cried hard for about three minutes out of nowhere because I know I’ll never have a daughter. Then I went and snuggled my sweet, stinky, fuzzy-haired boys and all was right in the world again.
3. You know what I never understand? Why people buy a souvenir t-shirt when they’re travelling with the name of the place on it, and then wear it in that place. You wear that shirt when you get home, people!
4. Earlier this month I was in a bar where there was a group of guys probably in their mid 20’s, and I was commenting to a friend how I still feel like I’m just like them. Like I could sashay up through that crowd of testosterone and sidle up to the bar, order a beer, and start hamming it up with those dudes. But…. I can’t. I’m no longer relevant to them. Not that I want to be, but it’s a strange feeling, becoming invisible.
5. My kids have been sick a lot lately and my husband was like, “why do they only want you when they’re sick?”
And I said, “because I made them.” So then he goes, “but I made them too!”
And I said, “HAHAHAHAHA. No. You did three minutes of cardio. I made them. THEY ARE OF ME. That is why they want me. That, and because I know where we keep the tylenol.”